So, I'm sitting cramped in my little seat in the 26th row, letter F (the window) and on my mini screen I'm watching a prerecorded video going over the safety info. Then when it gets to the part where the flight attendant demonstrates use #2 of my dual purpose seat cushion, it dawns on me... I'm on a domestic flight! In the event of engine failure or an exposion, what exactly are the chances of the plane going down over a body of water, so big as to absorb the impact of a plane and leave all of us passengers floating safely around it? I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that the chances aren't that great. So basically if the plane were to go down, paramedics would find me lying dead embracing a seat cushion.
And then we come to another interesting safety feature. Oxygen masks. I'm thinking that limited oxygen is the least of my worries if something goes so horribly awry that cabin pressure is drastically altered. Considering that I can barely swim to the bottom of a pool in the "deep end", I can only imagine what would happen to my ears at 30,000 feet. But hey, Thank God for these oxygen masks!! Now I won't suffer from Hypoxia! Oh wait, but I'm bleeding from the ears... and plummeting to my imminent death.
Showing posts with label Flying Follies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Flying Follies. Show all posts
Friday, May 30, 2008
Monday, March 17, 2008
Traveling Woes
"Hurry up," my dad called out to me. "American always leaves on time!"
"I'm hurrying," I yell back as I frantically look around my bedroom, correction, the "guest room" for anything I may have left behind. Nothing. Could it be? After ten years of travelling solo, I was going to actually leave with everything I'd arrived with? I quickly looked on the right side of the closet, empty, then I quickly looked on the left side of the closet... Of course. I start tearing clothes off the the hangers. Do I really need that 70s style turqoise dress that looks like its been bedazzled by a four year old?? Game time decision was "yes". Why? I don't know, actually. I made a similar game time decision back in the summer of 04 at a thrift shop in San Diego by buying this dress but as I've never worn it, logic should have told me that my game time decisions, well they suck.
I gather up my clothes and run downstairs. The dryer! I drop the pile of clothes on the floor and run back upstairs. I pull out the partially dried clothes and run back downstairs. I pick up each suitcase, because in addition to my many other talents, I know how to mentally calculate the weight of luggage... right. My shoes bag is definitely below 50 lbs. I shove the odd clothes into my shoes and cosmetics bag, and zip it up. I will definitely be rewashing when I arrive back in Durham.
I arrive at the airport with 10 minutes to check in. When I finally reach a machine, I have a minute left. I quickly swipe my card and check in. My flight is delayed by 15 minutes. I note the flight gods are with me today. I receive my boarding pass, check my luggage and head off to the security line. "Ma'am, outside and to the right," a woman tells me. That's weird, I think. Why would I need to go outside and... down to the next terminal? I panic because suddenly that 15 minute buffer isn't looking like much of a buffer. After 30 minutes in the security line, a TSA rep pulls me out of the the line, and I try to ignore the judging faces and dirty looks as I make my way to the front. I put my bags on the security belt fully aware of my unbagged gels, liquids, aerosols and prayed for the best. My faith in TSA restored, I race to my gate unhassled.
And sat on the plane... for an hour.
I came to 3 conclusions during that hour:
1. I really should have taken a second helping of my mother's delicious steak, potatoes and eggs
2. I don't need to have my cell phone switched off on a grounded plane.
3. I was not going to make my connection in St. Louis. So, no dad, American Airlines, does not always leave on time.
In the hours to follow, my life would take a turn for the worst. What should have been only 7 or 8 hours of travel, turned into a day and a half, two hours spent trying to locate missing luggage and an overnight stay at the Crowne Plaza Hotel in St. Louis. I can now empathize with those poor castaways of the Minnow. The only brightside to this nightmare was that I made a new friend, Lisa. We enjoyed dinner at TGIF Fridays, and a much needed St. Patty's Day shot. The great conversation and my medium/well done burger with onion rings was a great distraction, and I don't think I could have picked a better unintentional travelling buddy.
Finally arrived at RDU, a worn down bitter version of my former self, who you might only recognize if you'd seen me the day before as I was still wearing the same clothes. After retrieving my luggage, Lisa and I parted ways, and I was left to do this last leg on my own. I sat in front of the carosels and waited patiently for my roommate to pick me up. I used my hour and a half to read for class I wasn't attending... Why? Dunno. It just seemed like the right thing to do.
When my roommate pulled up, I was overcome with a warm feeling and happy to see a familiar face. I didn't want to leave LA, but after spending the past day and a half in limbo, seeing my roomie made me feel at home. On the way back to Durham we weighed my options, go to class late, don't go to class. Thankfully she helped me rationalize the situation. Game time decision: Go home and sleep. I think to myself, I really could have used her in the summer of 04.
"I'm hurrying," I yell back as I frantically look around my bedroom, correction, the "guest room" for anything I may have left behind. Nothing. Could it be? After ten years of travelling solo, I was going to actually leave with everything I'd arrived with? I quickly looked on the right side of the closet, empty, then I quickly looked on the left side of the closet... Of course. I start tearing clothes off the the hangers. Do I really need that 70s style turqoise dress that looks like its been bedazzled by a four year old?? Game time decision was "yes". Why? I don't know, actually. I made a similar game time decision back in the summer of 04 at a thrift shop in San Diego by buying this dress but as I've never worn it, logic should have told me that my game time decisions, well they suck.
I gather up my clothes and run downstairs. The dryer! I drop the pile of clothes on the floor and run back upstairs. I pull out the partially dried clothes and run back downstairs. I pick up each suitcase, because in addition to my many other talents, I know how to mentally calculate the weight of luggage... right. My shoes bag is definitely below 50 lbs. I shove the odd clothes into my shoes and cosmetics bag, and zip it up. I will definitely be rewashing when I arrive back in Durham.
I arrive at the airport with 10 minutes to check in. When I finally reach a machine, I have a minute left. I quickly swipe my card and check in. My flight is delayed by 15 minutes. I note the flight gods are with me today. I receive my boarding pass, check my luggage and head off to the security line. "Ma'am, outside and to the right," a woman tells me. That's weird, I think. Why would I need to go outside and... down to the next terminal? I panic because suddenly that 15 minute buffer isn't looking like much of a buffer. After 30 minutes in the security line, a TSA rep pulls me out of the the line, and I try to ignore the judging faces and dirty looks as I make my way to the front. I put my bags on the security belt fully aware of my unbagged gels, liquids, aerosols and prayed for the best. My faith in TSA restored, I race to my gate unhassled.
And sat on the plane... for an hour.
I came to 3 conclusions during that hour:
1. I really should have taken a second helping of my mother's delicious steak, potatoes and eggs
2. I don't need to have my cell phone switched off on a grounded plane.
3. I was not going to make my connection in St. Louis. So, no dad, American Airlines, does not always leave on time.
In the hours to follow, my life would take a turn for the worst. What should have been only 7 or 8 hours of travel, turned into a day and a half, two hours spent trying to locate missing luggage and an overnight stay at the Crowne Plaza Hotel in St. Louis. I can now empathize with those poor castaways of the Minnow. The only brightside to this nightmare was that I made a new friend, Lisa. We enjoyed dinner at TGIF Fridays, and a much needed St. Patty's Day shot. The great conversation and my medium/well done burger with onion rings was a great distraction, and I don't think I could have picked a better unintentional travelling buddy.
Finally arrived at RDU, a worn down bitter version of my former self, who you might only recognize if you'd seen me the day before as I was still wearing the same clothes. After retrieving my luggage, Lisa and I parted ways, and I was left to do this last leg on my own. I sat in front of the carosels and waited patiently for my roommate to pick me up. I used my hour and a half to read for class I wasn't attending... Why? Dunno. It just seemed like the right thing to do.
When my roommate pulled up, I was overcome with a warm feeling and happy to see a familiar face. I didn't want to leave LA, but after spending the past day and a half in limbo, seeing my roomie made me feel at home. On the way back to Durham we weighed my options, go to class late, don't go to class. Thankfully she helped me rationalize the situation. Game time decision: Go home and sleep. I think to myself, I really could have used her in the summer of 04.
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